Where Are the Fathers?

We face an unprecedented crisis in America today—the physical and emotional absence of fathers.

by Dave Boehi  

You see it in the awe-struck eyes of young boys in the inner city who look up to local gang members as their only role models.

You see it in the weary eyes of a mother trying to put her three young children to bed while her husband watches ESPN in the family room.

You see it in the downhearted eyes of a single mom whose former husband found another woman and moved across the country, leaving her with two angry teenage boys.

And you see it proud eyes of young men who feel they prove their manhood by impregnating teenage girls.

What you see, in short, is a cultural crisis that is more serious than many people realize—the absent father syndrome. Today's media often portrays the "New Father"—present in the delivery room, involved in raising the children, sharing household chores. But statistics tell a different story. Thanks to rising rates in divorce and illegitimate births, increased acceptance of premarital sex, and a growing confusion over male and female family roles, one can safely say that a growing number of "New Fathers" today are physically or emotionally removed from the lives of their children.      

It's as if America is determined to test the relevance of a philosophy satirically voiced by playwright Oscar Wilde: "Fathers should be neither seen nor heard. That is the only proper basis for family life."