Fifty Ways Porn Might Be Sneaking into Your Church

by Dannah Gresh

       Dannah Gresh shares her concern

    and wisdom to help ministry leaders

       approach "Fifty Shades of Grey" 

                with biblical savvy.

Editor's Note: The popularity of the book 
Fifty Shades of Grey is growing as more 
women (and men) pull it off the shelves 
this summer. Dannah Gresh is a sought-
after speaker and author who has 
studied sexuality in the Bible for more 
than fifteen years. In this bold article, 
Gresh shares her concern and wisdom to help ministry leaders approach the book with biblical 
savvy.

**

I’m not reading Fifty Shades
of Grey. I wasn’t planning to announce this, but I can’t help myself. I told my 
husband, Bob, that I didn’t really want to get involved. But then, I found out my girlfriend’s 70-year-old mom has her name on a long wait list at the library to borrow Fifty Shades of Grey. And then my mom told me that a relative I love and respect for her strong faith had already devoured the book. She regretfully “can’t get the images out of her head.”

So here I am. In an attempt to keep the images out of yours, I’d like to explain to you why I’m not reading Fifty Shades of Grey.

Reason #1:

Let’s start with the facts. Fifty Shades of Grey is classified as erotic fiction. According to one online dictionary, this genre of literature is defined as that which has “no literary or artistic value other than to stimulate sexual desire.” I’ve been studying what God says about sexuality for fifteen years. According to Him, there is only one who should stimulate sexual desire in me: my husband. Since that’s God’s plan for my sexual desire, anything other than my husband creating arousal in me would be missing the mark of God’s intention. (Translation: it is sin.)

Jesus said it this way: “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” The same is true of a woman looking at or reading about a man.

Reason #1? I believe reading erotica is sinful.
I guess I could stop there, but it won’t be enough for some of you. So let’s go to reason number two.

Reason #2:

The Bible has said for thousands of years that lust is hurtful and harmful.

Guess what? Biopsychologists and others are studying the effects of lust, pornography, and erotica on the brain and the body. They are finding that the Bible was, in fact, right. Over time, your body becomes conditioned to self-stimulation and gratification. It’s not just a preference. It’s physiological.

The lust cuts a literal pathway in your brain tissue that’s kind of like a rut. A rut you better be prepared to get stuck in. While at first a little bit of erotica might give you a taste for your spouse, overtime that rut reminds you how great you are at self-stimulation and how powerful your imagination can be.

You’ll become less interested in real sex with your husband. (Both SELF magazine and The New Yorker ran articles on this phenomenon in recent years. They both suggested that if you want to have a great sex life, you better push pause on porn!)

The fact is erotica robs you of real sex. It’s not good for your marriage or future marriage.

Reason #3:

OK, we’re girls. And sadly, a few of our guys have looked at porn. How’d that work for ya? How’d it make you feel? Did it cross your mind that you could never compare to the perfection created by lights, camera, and Photoshop? Well, he can’t compare to a plasticized, vanilla interpretation of manhood either.

Reason #4:

Do you know what BDSM is? Bondage, dominance, sadism, and masochism. If you don’t know what those words mean, be glad. If you do know, you should understand that the most damaging part of Fifty Shades of Grey is that God created sex to be a partnership that’s fueled by love and self-giving, not pain and humiliation.

It’s not just that this book misuses sex; it redefines it into something evil and transgressive as the lead character dominates in a hurtful manner. How women can enjoy that, I can’t understand! But I do have a theory. It seems to me that in our emasculating culture there is a hunger so great for strong men that women will stoop to bondage, dominance, sadism, and masochism for just a taste. Do yourself a favor, don’t!

You might be wondering if I’ve read the book. I haven’t. I don’t need to. There are many things in this world I need not partake in to discern that they are going to be harmful to me.

God has given me more than fifty shades of truth in His Word and when just one of them is in conflict with my entertainment choices, I choose to pass! To be clear: I wouldn’t drive my Envoy into the front of an oncoming semi-truck any more than I would open the pages of Fifty Shades of Grey. I love my marriage, my God, and myself too much.

If your heart resonates with mine, please take a moment today to post these words on Facebook or Twitter: “I’m not reading Fifty Shades of Grey.” If you have friends who need help understanding why, send them to this blog. I’d be happy to explain! 

Dannah Gresh, a best-selling author and sought-after speaker. Her best-selling titles include And the Bride Wore White and 2010’s best-selling CBA youth book, Lies Young Women Believe co-authored with Nancy Leigh DeMoss. She says the most important book she has or will ever write is What Are You Waiting For: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex, which traces the Hebrew language of sexuality from Genesis to Revelation answering every question a heart could ask. She has long been at the forefront of the movement to encourage tweens and teens to be modest and to pursue purity and is the founder of Secret Keeper Girl a live tour event for tween girls and their moms.

More from Dannah Gresh or visit Dannah at purefreedom.org

 Jerome Scott Loring−

As one who thoroughly enjoys a good debate, I must say that this made for some very interesting reading!

I was reminded again of the words of C.S. Lewis, "Good philosophy must exist, if for no other reason, because bad philosophy needs to be answered."

Lewis believed that God had called him to a learned life. He went on to describe how that many in the faith need learned men and women to speak up...in fact, he felt he was bound by God's call on his life to speak up for those who could not.

I think there are some principles that can perhaps be applied to this discussion, and I offer my thoughts here with the hope that they will serve to help some.

- First, all believers are to be discerning. There are no second-generation Christians. If you are born of the Spirit, you have the Spirit of Truth abiding in you and He has promised to guide our every step, if we yield our will to Him. We are all called to test the spirits to see if they are of God. 

- Secondly, the Bible clearly teaches us that our hearts are deceitful and desperately wicked. We are warned of the lust of the eyes, the lust of the flesh and the pride of life. There is none among us who is not capable of the very worst of sin. The old preacher, Harry Ironside, confessed one time, "I am a far worse person than anything I've ever done." 

- Thirdly, as C.S. Lewis recognized, God calls each of us to perform various functions in the body of Christ. Some are called to teach, others to Pastor, etc... Some are indeed called, as was C.S. Lewis, to understand the "bad" philosophy in order to be able to give an answer and pronounce the "good" philosophy. Some have a protective role in the body, protecting the innocent or naive or the young. We are, after all, called sheep.

- Fourthly, true spirituality is not defined by what we do or don't do (or in this case, do or don't read.) True spirituality is defined as living a life in submission to God and living by faith.

- Fifthly, the Bible clearly teaches that believers will differ on issues of Christian conduct and that each man should behave as the Lord gives him/her liberty. Paul, however, raised the bar, saying that even though he might feel free to do something, if he knew that it would offend a weaker brother (his words, not mine), then he simply would not do it, out of love for his brother. 

- Sixthly, when believers do disagree, (and we may vehemently disagree), we are still commanded to love one another. Paul and Barnabas parted ways after a sharp disagreement. We are not told that either of them was wrong, and later it does appear that they were able to come to terms. Being able to disagree and still love each other is part of the plan. After all, each of us in a disagreement recognizes that each of us is judged by God alone ultimately.

- Seventhly, we are commanded to flee lust, to avoid even the appearance of evil, (that's the negative) and rather to think about things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent or praiseworthy. (That's the positive.)

- Eighthly, we are called to discern, to test, to warn, to exhort, to confront, to rebuke, but not to judge. God has reserved that right to Himself.

Our primary focus should be on filling our minds and hearts with the truth of God's Word, yielding to the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives, teaching and admonishing one another in Psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, and sharing the message of the gospel with a world that is lost.

I think perhaps Mary, Jesus' mother, gave the best advice that one could give. At the wedding feast, she told them, "Whatever He (Jesus) tells you to do...do it."

God richly bless you.http://www.churchleaders.com/pastors/pastor-articles/161740-dannah_gresh_im_not_reading_fifty_shades_of_grey.html