Brenda Robinson: What Seemed Hopeless

TESTIMONY

By Christine Wilson

The 700 Club

CBN.com – It began with a small headache. Then 24-year-old Brenda Robinson dismissed the pain, blaming it on fatigue.  The last thing she remembers was sitting down for dinner at her sister’s.

“When I came to, I said, ‘What’s going on? Did we eat dinner?’  And she said, ‘It’s been two weeks since that dinner. You’ve had probably about 100 seizures, gran mal epileptic seizures in two weeks.’ I started to move, and I couldn’t move. I was paralyzed. She said, ‘Your speech has even been paralyzed. You’ve been trying to talk to us for two weeks, and you couldn’t.’”

Two weeks, including several visits to the hospital, had vanished from her memory. She was diagnosed with gran mal epilepsy, which brought on violent, debilitating seizures.  The seizures were difficult for her whole family, including her husband Dan.

People inventing fake Rick Warren Facebook pages

By Dan Wooding
Founder of ASSIST Ministries

LAKE FOREST, CA
(ANS) – Following the tragic death of 27-year-old Matthew Warren, the youngest son of Pastor Rick Warren and his wife, Kay, who committed suicide “momentary wave of despair” in April, the Saddleback pastor has been facing another problem – a large number of fake Rick Warren Facebook pages.

In a message posted today (Friday, May 24, 2013) on his page – www.facebook.com/pastorrickwarren – he wrote, “Dear Facebook Friends, I have a personal favor to ask.

Vitriol infests Rick Warren family’s grief

Pastor Rick Warren greets the audience
before a forum with the presidential nominees
at his Saddleback Church on Aug. 16, 2008.
Religion News Service
file photo by Ann Johansson.

(RNS)  Pastor Rick Warren, the best-known name in American evangelism after Rev. Billy Graham, lost his 27-year-old son, Matthew, to suicide on Friday (April 5).

In the days since, uncounted strangers have joined the 20,000 congregants who worship at the megachurch network “Pastor Rick” built in Southern California, Warren’s nearly 1 million Twitter followers and hundreds of thousands of Facebook followers in flooding social media with consolation and prayer.

“Kay and I are overwhelmed by your love, prayers, and kind words,” Warren tweeted on Sunday. “You are all encouraging our #brokenhearts.”

But a shocking number are taking the moment of media attention to lash out at Warren on their digital tom-toms. The attacks are aimed both at him personally and at his Christian message.

Roman Forms of Crucifixion

Crucifixion wasn't always carried out the way we've seen it typically depicted in paintings and pictures.

Crucifixion wasn't always carried out the way we've seen it typically depicted in paintings and pictures. In fact, as noted in this chapter, a crucifixion victim likely wasn't nailed through the hands, since their structure cannot support the weight of a human body. Most likely victims were nailed through the wrist or, in some instances, had their arms tied rather than being nailed.

Nor were victims always crucified on the kind of cross typically shown in depictions of Christ's crucifixion. Note what The Anchor Bible Dictionary says in its article on crucifixion:

Real-Life Vampire Addicted to Blood, Doctors Claim

By Megan Gannon, News Editor | LiveScience.com

In a chilling case report, doctors in Turkey have described what they claim to be a real-life vampire with multiple personalities and an addiction to drinking blood.

The 23-year-old married man apparently started out slicing his own arms, chest and belly with razor blades, letting the blood drip into a cup so he could drink it. But when he experienced compulsions to drink blood "as urgent as breathing," he started turning to other sources, the doctors said.

The man, whose name and hometown were not revealed in the report, was arrested several times after stabbing and biting others to collect and drink their blood. He apparently even got his father to get him bags of the ghastly drink from blood banks, according to the report released today (Feb. 8) by the Journal of Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics. The case study was published last fall.

Sex Tape Celebrities Are Leading Our Teens Astray

RON LUCE

 

96

 

6

 

0

 

0

 

Kim Kardashian (© John Russo via Facebook)

The perils of public exposure can sometimes be lost on our teens. We live in a society that celebrates and elevates people who make bad decisions. They don’t have to be sorry, they simply have to “be strong.”

That’s the phrase tweeted out by former Miss Teen Delaware Melissa King after she was accused of starring in an amateur porn film when she was just 17 years old. King denied that the girl in the film, who looks like her, sounds like her and shares her birthday and her love of beauty pageants, is her. But two days after news broke that she had relinquished her crown over these accusations, she tweeted out to her followers:

Dr. Thomas Harris, a Reported Suicide, Spikes Rumormongers: 'i'm Ok—you're in Trouble'

By Nancy Faber

Years ago there was a book on the market called I'm OK—You're OK. People said, "That's a wonderful new book—new psychology, new things to follow." Most people today don't know that the author of that book committed suicide about two years ago.
A Maryland radio preacher named Larry Tomczak allegedly imparted this information to a crowd of 8,000 at the Jesus West Coast rally in Chico, Calif. a year ago. No one was more upset at the news than Dr. Thomas Harris, the Sacramento psychiatrist who wrote the 1969 best-selling self-help book, and who was and is very much alive. Even before the rally his family had been hounded by the rumors. His daughters were questioned about him at school. His wife, Amy, a journalist and collaborator on the book, received a note of concern from a woman in Japan. A graduate seminar at a California university pondered the meaning of his death, and at least one after-dinner speaker made a joke of Harris' not-OK end. "Once, the girls heard a rumor that he had killed somebody as well," shudders Amy. "It was all so gross." 

Women and Islam

Simply put, women are treated as second-class citizens in most Muslim-majority nations. And this is not an anomaly of Islam: it fully follows from authoritative Islamic tradition. The example of Muhammad is paramount in this regard, and full justification for the poor treatment of women is found in all the main texts: the Koran, the hadith, and the sira.

But I have detailed all this elsewhere. See here for example:

www.billmuehlenberg.com/2006/11/02/islam-and-women/www.billmuehlenberg.com/2008/02/22/islam-and-women-2/
And it does not take a Westerner to point all this out. Many within Islam are aware of the problems, and many former Muslims are speaking against this. One such former Muslim is Ibn Warraq. He has written extensively on this particular issue, and the dangers of Islam in general.

The Queen James Bible and ‘Homophobic’ Interpretations

MICHAEL BROWN

1065

61

2

395

The Queen James Bible (queenjamesbible.com)

In case you haven’t heard the news, there is a new edition of the King James Bible that rewrites eight key verses that speak against homosexual practice. It’s called the Queen James Bible (I kid you not), and the editors state that, “We edited those eight verses in a way that makes homophobic interpretations impossible.”

Yes, you can now practice homosexuality and read your Bible without feeling condemned, although you still have to deal with the hundreds of verses affirming only heterosexual marriage and family (including one of the Ten Commandments that says, “Honor your father and mother” rather than, “Honor your father and father”).

Your Salvation Is Secure

“Lead me not into temptation; I can find the way myself.” —Church marquee

“Forbidden fruit creates many jams.” —Church marquee

Hundreds of years ago, one of the great church fathers, Martin Luther, patterned his whole day around ensuring that he didn’t sin. He was terrified that if he sinned, he would lose his salvation. Every evening he’d wrack his brain, trying to remember if he did something, said something, or thought something sinful.

Have you ever done that? It’s pretty miserable just to think about, isn’t it? If you believe that by sinning you can lose your salvation, tons of questions come up. How many sins do you have to commit to get booted out of the family? Or is it qualitative? Is there a “badness scale” of sin on which we can rate ourselves? Where is murder? Rape? Suicide? Adultery? Child abuse? Lust? Stealing? What about laziness or procrastination? How do we know if something is really a sin or not?

WILL CHRISTIANS WHO COMMIT SUICIDE GO TO HEAVEN?

Serge Roux-Levrat

As the number of suicide increases dramatically in the developed countries, both in the traditional sense, as well as in assisted suicide, many Christians are wondering what happens to believers who take their lives. As always, theologians are divided on this key question. However, if we look at it from the only angle we can – that of love and hope – we will find out that the answer is much more obvious than we think.

Top 10 Health Threats for Men

These are the worst of the worst -- the 10 most dangerous diseases for men. Every man needs to know what he's up against. The good news? Many are preventable.

Heart Attack and Cardiac Arrest in Men

You've heard the terms a million times. But do you really know the difference between a heart attack and cardiac arrest? Here's what every guy needs to know.
Heart Attack and Cardiac Arrest in Men

Mental Health Myths

"KIDS WILL BE KIDS" Myth: Teenagers don't suffer from "real" mental illnesses — they are just moody. Fact: One in five teens has some type of mental health problem in a given year. (National Institute of Mental Health/Harvard University Study June 2005) Myth: Talk about suicide is an idle threat that need not be taken seriously. Fact: Suicide is the third leading cause of death among high school students and the second leading cause of death in college students. Talk about suicide should always be taken seriously. (Jed Foundation) Myth: Childhood mental health problems are really the result of poor parenting. Fact: If someone in your family has a mental illness, then you may have a greater chance of developing the illness, but mental illness generally has little or nothing to do with parenting. One in four families is affected by a mental health problem(Surgeon General's Report on Mental Health)

Understanding Postpartum Illness

WHAT IS POSTPARTUM ILLNESS? For those who have never been affected by Postpartum Illness, it is difficult to fully comprehend how the excitement and anticipation of a new birth can turn into depression. Why, when a new baby has miraculously been welcomed into a family, does an all-enveloping reaction sometimes set in and cause such devastation to the mother? Over 80% of new mothers experience a brief period of 'baby blues' immediately following the baby's arrival, a clinical depression that lasts several weeks or longer can signal a very real illness. In such cases, a birth can trigger a terrifying spectrum of symptoms which, if left untreated, can lead to tragic and even fatal consequences. Postpartum Illness can disable not only the woman, but her entire family as well. Families may fall apart, with stable homes being ripped apart in divorce; unfortunately, children often bear the brunt of this outcome. It is undisputed that if untreated, Postpartum Illness can lead to abuse, hospitalization, suicide and infanticide.

Hitting Rock Bottom

Many people consider depression as a social taboo. As a result, a great majority of people who are depressed do not seek help. They face their battles alone, with no one but themselves to turn to. Their subtle cries for help are silenced, and their grief is discounted to something no more than a mere case of “the blues”. 


Eventually they hit rock bottom and the only solution to end their grief is suicide — a permanent solution to a temporary and treatable problem. Can God intervene in a seemingly hopeless plight? A man shares the story of how he felt devoured by his depression and the surprising phone call he received shortly after writing his letter of goodbye. 


Watch the video    http://powertochange.com/itv/spirituality/hitting-rock-bottom/?HD=true

Rebuilding Trust

Written by Lynette Hoy NCC, LCPC

       Other languages            中文           

Has your trust been broken? Talk to a mentor today.

One of my clients once asked me what it means to trust another human being. She wanted to know how she should react when a spouse or significant other is dishonest, inconsiderate or having an affair. She wondered if it is possible to rebuild trust in someone who disappoints us greatly.

What does trusting someone signify?

Trust, in a practical sense, means that you place confidence in someone to be honest with you, faithful to you, keep promises, vows and confidences and not abandon you. Here are some factors to consider about trust. Trusting another person requires a realistic perspective about people and an expectation of failure. Trust needs to be combined with a willingness to forgive and grows best in an environment of acceptance and love.

There’s no magic machine, you don’t put in a quarter and out drops a can of trust — trust grows over time. People are complex, broken beings therefore, previous hurts, fears or losses can impede their determination to trust and/or be truthful in a relationship. But, people have the capacity and the ability to change and to grow in trust and truthfulness. You can rebuild trust in broken relationships when you make a choice to do so with the supernatural help of God.

Adjust your expectations

Unconditional love develops trust because as you express this kind of love towards someone — generally he or she will sense your acceptance and feel comfortable to be vulnerable and honest about their feelings. Unconditional love actually builds self-esteem in others and alleviates their fears of rejection. People learn that they can be authentic with you about their feelings, opinions, and failures. The result is a growing trust in the other person. Not because that person is perfect but because that person is growing in honesty. People are human, frail, and sinful. Therefore, you need a realistic type of trust when you choose to trust someone. Trusting grows in relationships over time because as you spend time together with someone you build knowledge, understanding and authenticity. You gain insight into another person’s character, needs, motivations and fears.

A Conversation about Love & God
Has love betrayed you? Is it preventing you from believing that you are a human being who is loved by God? You are intelligent, beautiful, loved, and not alone.

Unconditional love is patient and kind

It is not self-seeking. It does not keep a record of wrongs. When love is not patient or enduring; when love is unforgiving and always disappointed or looking for something to go wrong, it generates fear and looks for imperfections in the other person. Fear-based love is conditional creating an atmosphere of distrust, dishonesty and instability.

You can have a limited trust in people as you grow to know them and they see you really care about them but the fact is that people will let us down. That is reality. Obviously, when someone has broken their vows and been unfaithful, has lied or been dishonest in the relationship, they need to change. You can make some requests for change and take the risk of starting over again. Get counseling and pastoral guidance. You can find a counselor or go to the nearest mental health center. If you are suicidal please contact 911 (in the USA & Canada) or go to a hospital emergency room.

If that person is not sincere about changing and continues to lie or betray you, then, you need to consider whether to end the relationship.

Take a look at yourself as well

You will never be perfect and therefore, you will probably disappoint your loved one as well. You can promise to never say something hurtful or never tell a lie or never exaggerate or always keep your promises or (you name it) but since you are human you will also make mistakes and disappoint that person. The only thing you or your loved one can promise is to grow, to seek God and ask Him for strength to change. Then you and your loved one will become more trustworthy in your relationships, though you will never be perfect.

Every human relationship will suffer hurt. Thus, we all need to become better forgivers and confessors. That ability to reconcile and spirit of humbleness will prove the depth of your love and commitment.

The components of love, forgiveness and commitment are as necessary to trust in a relationship as is honesty. Forgiveness gives you the chance to start over and trust another fallible human being again. Love helps to nourish trust. Commitment and honesty provide accountability to one another.

The ability to forgive is rooted in being forgiven ourselves. In the Bible it says that God loves the world so much that he sent his only son so that we could be forgiven. As people we all make mistakes, not one of us can live up to the standard God set on our own. But God promises that if we accept what Jesus did for us, we can be forgiven. The slate can be wiped clean no matter what has happened in the past. God promises us strength for today and bright hope for the future. Whatever happened in your yesterdays God can take care of all of your tomorrows.

You can receive Christ right now by faith through prayer. Praying is simply talking to God. God knows your heart and is not so concerned with your words as He is with the attitude of your heart. Here’s a suggested prayer:

Lord Jesus, I want to know you personally. Thank you for dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life to you and ask you to come in as my Saviour and Lord. Take control of my life. Thank you for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. Make me the kind of woman you want me to be.

If this prayer expresses the desire of your heart, pray it right now and Christ will come into your life as He promised. If you invited Jesus Christ into your life, thank God often that He is in your life, that He will never leave you and that you have eternal life. As you learn more about your relationship with God, and how much He loves you, you’ll experience life to the fullest.

If you have a question first, click here.

http://powertochange.com/discover/sex-love/rebuildtrust/                                              

Dealing with Despair: Dark Moments of the Soul

Written by Mike Woodard

I picked up the bottle of iodine, focusing on the skull and cross bones symbol. I did not have a cut that needed disinfecting. I was hurt on the inside. I had just returned to my room from a meeting. A long time friend had said something that cut deep. Holding the bottle, the thought that came to my mind was, “I could drink this!”

The thought was serious, but just for a moment. I was hurt, tired, and so discouraged that despair seemed to rush in. I’ve never forgotten that moment and have never told anyone until now. Maybe it is so vivid because my normal view of life is optimistic. I often tell people, “I don’t have problems, I have opportunities…”

Despair can have many sources and can be more profound combined with other factors. A friend’s 18 year old daughter attempted to take her life. The combination for her was the knee operation that took her out of her last year of high school sports, the friend who had criticized her harshly, a broken relationship, alcohol, and physical/emotional tiredness. Late one night, after everyone went to bed, she picked up her pain medication and downed the whole bottle. Fortunately for her and my friend, despair did not win. Others are not so fortunate.

Beginning Again: I turned my life around
Do you need a fresh start in life?: Talk to a mentor

Despair is dangerous and can be deadly. I remember reading once, “People can live weeks without food, days without water, minutes without oxygen, but not a moment without hope.” On a personal level I have found it helpful to identify factors that contribute to despair and also cling to the things that give me hope.

Some of these factors may seem insignificant. I have found when I’m hungry and tired I’m more prone to lose perspective. The best thing I can do is eat and sleep.

I know that when I have emotional highs from lots of people contact or events, this can result in my emotional bank account being over extended. When that happens I can expect an emotional low to follow. When I know and anticipate this cycle I find I’m much more able to deal with it. Despair is held at bay.

Another warning signal of emotional tiredness can be emotions being closer to the surface. This can show up through angry “blow ups” or tears. You might even think, “Wow! Where did that come from?” These all give despair a foothold.

Another fertile soil for despair to take root in is the words of trusted friends. Words of close friends can be so powerful either for good or bad. I don’t care much about what people say who do not know me, but the words of my trusted friends carry significant weight. This is why divorce can be so profound. The person who knows you the best has just said, “I do not value or want you.” Wow! That is painful! Despair is swift and can be suffocating.

Hope becomes an antidote to despair. A variety of things can bring hope. Perspective can bring hope. The following story illustrates this point…

On a foggy morning in July 1952, Florence Chadwick waded into the chilly waters off Catalina Island. Her goal was to swim the Channel to the coast of California. The numbing cold of the water hit her right away, and she could barely see the boat that accompanied her in the dense fog. Several times during her swim, a rifle was fired to keep sharks away. She swam for 15 hours before she asked to be taken out of the water. Her trainer encouraged her to keep going, saying she was very close to land. Florence was no stranger to long distance swimming. She had been the first women to swim the English Channel in both directions. But this day, as she neared the coast of California, all she could see was the fog. She was exhausted, and began to feel discouraged, thinking she was not going to be able to make it… Florence gave up, just a half mile from her goal! In the interview after the swim, she was quoted as saying, “I’m not excusing myself, but if I had only been able to see the land, I might have been able to make it.”

What was it that caused Florence to give up that day? Was it the cold water, exhaustion or fear? No, the reason she failed to reach her goal was the fog. Two months later, she swam that same Catalina channel and set a new speed record in the process.

I need fog clearing moments, times when I take stock of my life and circumstances. Sometimes this comes through stopping activity and taking stock or it might involve finding an objective listener who can help you clear the fog. This might mean a trip or two to a councilor or a wise, trusted friend.

Faith can bring hope, ultimate hope. King David once stated, “I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.” Confidence that there is a God who loves me and has a good plan in the mist of pain, and hurt is a profound defense against despair. I was once removed from a position of leadership suddenly without warning. I was flooded with deep emotions at the unjustness of this decision. As my mind was reeling trying to make sense of this I remembered the words of a friend. In describing a similar set of circumstances she was buoyed by the understanding that God was not wringing his hands in heaven. He had a plan. Those words hit me. A significant sense of confidence settled in. Confidence that God loved me and even in this he had a plan for a way through. There was still pain, confusion and hurt but knowing God’s love and presence provided a foundation to handle the pain.

A person cannot live long with despair. Dealing with despair takes two forms, prevention and long term cure. Prevention is the strategy of dealing with conditions that lead to despair which can include simple things like enough rest or talking out discouragement with a trusted friend.

Prevention involves finding a foundation that gives hope; especially in the mist of circumstances that are despair producing. God can provide that foundation. His love can hold you in the midst of any storm. His wisdom can guide you through it and his strength can steady you as you move forward. Despair need not overtake you. Why not open the door of your despair and invite God into it. Ask him to walk with you. Don’t try to live independently from him. He invites you to share the journey with him. Why not choose God as your foundation today?

If you would like to invite God into that place of despair today why not pray this prayer right now:

Dear God,
My despair is overwhelming. I don’t know what to do. I need your strength to anchor me and your wisdom to guide me. I need you to give me a firm footing as I work through this. I invite you into my life right now. Forgive me for living independent from you. I need you. Come into my life and bring me hope today. Amen.

If you prayed this prayer let us know. A mentor can help you in this new journey of faith.

If you have a question first, click here.

gotquestions  http://powertochange.com/discover/life/dealingwithdespair/

A Mother’s Love

Written by Doris Beebe

Being rejected by the very one who gave birth to you is a hard thing to live with.

I can remember at the age of three or four, seeing my mother’s hard, cold face as she turned her cheek to me when I wanted to give her a good night kiss. Why doesn’t she love me? I wondered. I didn’t have an answer, but I knew that she just couldn’t.

I had many feelings growing up with my mother. She was a lot of things I did not ever want to be. She would sleep until noon and leave me to fend for myself. She frequently cheated on my father, who was suffering from schizophrenia.

Eventually, I got to live with my grandparents. Off and on, my mother would move in with my grandparents, my brother, sister and I. She and my father divorced, and when I was thirteen my father committed suicide.

Who did Jesus think he was? And why should I care?
Still have questions?Ask a mentor

My grandmother worked all the time and my mother had no control over me. In fact, we did not speak if we were in the same house. She would come and go with my brother and sister and I would be home alone with Grandma, who allowed me total freedom. With peer pressure and little guidance, I began to make some wrong choices in my search for the love that I had never received.

I got married at sixteen just to get out of the house and to have the family I never had. The relationship was abusive, and I was restless, so I ran away with another man and I became pregnant.

All the things I hated in my mother began to take place in my life. I tried so hard to avoid her mistakes, but I remained in a lifestyle of promiscuity and neglect of the little girl I gave birth to. My life was spinning out of control, and when the spinning stopped I landed back home without my child. She was two when I left.

One night, in a bar, I met a man named Joe. Three short weeks after I met him we were married.

It was then that I began to look for a way to turn my life around. I could feel something tugging at me, pulling me to leave the lifestyle I had been trapped in. I believe that “something” was God.

I began to seek Him out. I needed to know who God was, why He’d made me and what purpose there could be for my life. Fortunately, He promised us that if we seek Him, we will find Him. Jesus said, “Everyone who asks will receive, everyone who searches will find, and the door will be opened for everyone who knocks.” In 1993, I met God.

I learned that I could have a personal relationship with God, through His Son, Jesus Christ. He would love me and never leave me. He would forgive me for the things I had done and make me a new person. I could have the family and the love I had never known through Him. I invited Him into my life and I have been walking beside Him ever since.

My hatred for my mother caused me a lot of years of pain, but I finally realized that I was not hurting her. I was hurting myself and I was in bondage to her because I held her in my heart full of hate. God released me from this when I forgave her. A couple of years ago I came face to face with my mother at my grandmother’s funeral. I told her about the changes in my life and I told her that I forgave her. I was able to tell her that I loved her.

I am still separated from my oldest daughter, but she knows that I love her and that I made some wrong choices. I am now raising three of my own children and my sister’s child. When I look into the eyes of my sister’s baby–who is now the same age as my oldest child was when I left her–I can see myself at that age. I know that Jesus forgives, as I am allowed to be the mother I never knew.

Take a look at your life. How would you describe it? Contented? Rushed? Exciting? Stressful? Moving forward? Holding back? For many of us it’s all of the above at times. There are things we dream of doing one day, there are things we wish we could forget. In the Bible, it says that Jesus came to make all things new. What would your life look like if you could start over with a clean slate?

Living with hope

If you are looking for peace, there is a way to balance your life. No one can be perfect, or have a perfect life. But every one of us has the opportunity to experience perfect grace through a personal relationship with God through His Son, Jesus Christ.

You can receive Christ right now by faith through prayer. Praying is simply talking to God. God knows your heart and is not so concerned with your words as He is with the attitude of your heart. Here’s a suggested prayer:

Lord Jesus, I want to know you personally. Thank you for dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life to you and ask you to come in as my Savior and Lord. Take control of my life. Thank you for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. Make me the kind of person you want me to be.

Does this prayer express the desire of your heart? You can pray it right now, and Jesus Christ will come into your life, just as He promised.

Is this the life for you?

If you invited Christ into your life, thank God often that He is in your life, that He will never leave you and that you have eternal life. As you learn more about your relationship with God, and how much He loves you, you’ll experience life to the fullest.

If you have a question first, click here.

gotquestions  http://powertochange.com/discover/faith/amotherslove/

8 Responses to “A Mother’s Love”

Sort by: Oldest

• Doris says:

  April 11, 2012 at 1:55 pm

  I am the Author of this article and want to say to Belinda that the gift of forgiveness is the best gift you can give to yourself… It is about freedom !!
  I am Proud of you … hopenotwasted@yahoo.com is my contact …

  Blessings,

  Doris
• Brenda Millersays:

  March 6, 2012 at 6:37 am

  HI Belinda,

  I am so sorry for your pain. The rejection you experienced is heart-wrenching, and the sorrow you continue to undergo is palpable.

  Belinda, it is wonderful that you forgave your mother on her deathbed, and I believe that if you continue to claim that forgiveness daily you will find healing. The enemy wants to remind you of the pain, of the rejection, but Jesus wants to remind you of His amazing love and healing that He has for you. It is so important that you believe in the Hope that can be found in Christ, Belinda. I want to give you a couple of links to encourage you. The first one is on hope, and the second is on overcoming bitterness. I pray they are a blessing to you:

  http://powertochange.com/blogposts/2012/03/01/rebuilding-old-ruins-in-christ/

  http://www.gfa.ca/resource/audio/

  Look at the bottom of the page under the mp3 downloads for the second link, Belinda, for KP Yohannan’s message on bitterness. It is tremendous, and has blessed me greatly, as I was also rejected by both of my parents when I was a child right through until my adulthood, when my mother and father and I were able to reconcile.

  I am thankful that you have been able to share so honestly with us your pain, Belinda, and I will be praying for you. May God richly bless you in every area of your life as you turn to Him for your healing.
• BELINDA says:

  March 4, 2012 at 12:12 pm

  Thank you for sharing your story. I’m fighting the same rejection. My mother did everything she could to destroy me. I living in hell right now with no direction.
  Before she passed, she turned everyone against me. I have no self purpose and everyone is in denial about her abuse to me. She had a nervous breakdown after she gave birth to me. I think she blamed me and and tried to destroy my life. She secretly abused me, by pushing me down in extreme hot water burning my back, slapping me when no one was looking, pulling my finger back. I grew up very angery and was confused that no one would help me. When I told on her she told them I was crazy. That label has destroyed my life!

  I have no relationships with my siblings,due to her lying and making them look at me as the worst person in the world. I have prayed and ask god to take this pain from my heart. I wont go away, I told her when she was on her death bed I forgive you and I love you. I told her I just wanted her to love me and hold me. I didn’t know what her touch felt like.
• Juliana Kratman says:

  September 5, 2011 at 12:17 pm

  Doris, you are a wonderful person to be able to accept god as your personal savior and be able to forgive your mother. You are a true amazing person.
• Juliana Kratman says:

  September 5, 2011 at 12:15 pm

  Steve, is it true that your relationship with Doris was abusive? And Doris, that was beautifal.
• Doris says:

  January 24, 2010 at 10:03 pm

  I am Doris and want to say thank you to Steve and Sarah.
• Sarah says:

  January 19, 2010 at 7:26 pm

  great testimony
• Steve Cimerhanzel says:

  June 12, 2009 at 5:52 am

  I’m the 1st husband that married Doris at 16 years old. I’m happy to see she has accepted the lord as her personal savior.